Whir Prison is a torture device made from cardboard. It's hard to appreciate its underdog story, especially from across the table, but the tale of Whir Prison's rise is the tale of Modern. A primitive list goes 5-0 in a League, raises eyebrows, and is soon forgotten… until the same player puts up another result, and another, and another. The narrative quickly shifts: of course the deck isn't good; its pilot is just a savant. Their success is a bizarre anomaly. Don't try this at home!
When people finally do try it, skeptics become believers. Their collective effort refines the deck until it becomes universally hailed as a contender — and a threat. As I look ahead to SCG Regionals this weekend, and the Open in Philadelphia after that, I expect to see players in the know stirring and whirring their way to the top.
After a few whirs of my own invention, I took a twist on this shell for a spin at the Modern Classic in Syracuse and was rewarded with a trophy:
I'll explain why I chose this list and where I'd go from here, but we must step back first. To understand what this deck is, you must understand what it isn't.