I finally got to play multiplayer the other night — good old-fashioned multiplayer, with theme decks and inefficient card choices. Playing things 'cause you like the cards or the art is cool. There's nothing like having a Gerrard's Battle Cry in play with a bunch of white knights, and your opponent plays his SECOND MANA FLARE!

WHEEE!! God, I've missed that kind of play. Laughing, joking... Acting out the death scene of being killed by a swarm of Scryb Sprites. The blatant"politics" of toadying and cajoling someone into attacking someone else when you are defenseless, then cackling like a loon when you topdeck and play a Wrath of God next turn and reset the whole game (and go on to win, I might add!) It was FUN! Playing Magic was FUN!

Damn. Forgot that was really possible.

Better yet, the multiplayer advanced in complexity as the night went on. Theme decks passed away to simple constructs that meant to actually try and win, and the competition got more interesting. Mana Flare/Crimson Hellkite and White Knight decks gave way to U/R"ping and control" cards and W/G Hurricane/Worship decks... And some strategy actually seeped in. I was playing with Carla and her husband James, neither of whom have played Magic since Tempest (when I started). So many concepts were new to them (the 6th edition rules, for example) but they played with cards like Demonic Tutor and Siren's Call, which were before my time. Best of all, Carla would Tutor for some ungodly Legends card (a 10/4 dude with casting cost 1URB, B to regenerate... I can't remember it's name) (Lord of Tresserhorn -- The Ferrett, thanking Mike Mason for reminding him) and then give it trample... and just go to town. It was so casual... so relaxed. It was a gas.

All of this was in comparison to what happened a couple of weeks ago. I was playing some duels at my local card shop with a guy named Russel. He's a high schooler with a real commitment to the game... Knows all the decks, has all the cards, and plays a mean Type II, but really enjoys 5 color (I've never done that yet.) This was going well — when a few other folks showed up. I suggested multiplayer.

My mistake. Shoot me for saying,"Oh, play anything you want. It's multiplayer. It's all for fun." I should have known that MY idea of fun didn't apply to everyone. To his credit, Russel decided to try his 5 Color to see what would happen. I played my multi-threat W/G deck. Another guy had a black deck that we never got to see do a thing, because our fourth, Russel's pal, pulled out something nasty.

Now, he didn't name it right away... But after a first-turn Ancestral Knowledge (I think) and a second-turn Goblin Bombardment, Russel shook his head, saying,"Aw, you're playing THAT deck?"

I looked puzzled. Russel said,"You know how Fruity Pebbles works, right?"

I looked puzzled. Russel launched into a complex description of recursion and Rectors and I waved him to stop and asked, pointing at the two enchantments,"Which one should I get rid of?" He said the Bombardment... I cast Disenchant.

My next play was an Aura Shards. Russel cracked up... And the Pebbles guy whined. I still didn't understand why, except that Pebbles depended on Enchantments, so that was good. We played a few more rounds, then Pebbles-guy destroyed my Aura Shards. Next turn he plays another Goblin Bombardment, plays an Academy Rector... And declares game!

I look puzzled. Russel just looks at Pebbles-guy and says,"Show him." Pebbles-guy sacs Rector to Bombardment, searches out Enduring Renewal... casts Phyrexian Walker. Infinite sac time.

At least I wasn't puzzled anymore."Shoot. So that's a combo?" I think to myself."No wonder people bitch about them all the time.

Still, I thought, that can't happen ALL the time... can it?

Next game... Turn three. I think one of us other guys had a land in play... Pebbles-guy says,"Rector... game."

No, I wasn't puzzled anymore... I was pissed. So pissed I had to leave. I couldn't even sit at a table with that deck any more.

That was supposed to be fun? People complained about Masticore with THAT kind of crap out there? I mean, I guess I could understand playing that in a blood-and-money tournament... But casual multiplayer? What's the point?

Well... I lost my innocence, that's for sure. I'd never understood when folks complained that Magic could get too competitive to be fun. When people complained about playing against decks that went off on turn 3 and never even cared what they were doing, I just didn't get it. I'd never experienced it personally. Kind of like caring about what happens in the Balkans when I'm not personally being shot at by snipers, or fearing thugs at my door at night with Racial Cleansing on their minds. It doesn't really sink home until it happens to you.

Well, I get it now. I'm not even sure how a multiplayer group where everyone was out to get Pebbles-guy could even do it. Every person would have to pack four to eight Disenchants and have them at exactly the right time. Give him the slightest moment and it's"Game over, man!" ( whiny Hudson voice, there.)

Ugh.

All I can say is, thank you James and Carla and your fun, goofy, casual play, to remind me why I started this game in the first place.

Neil

P.S.: Oh -- and thank you, Apocalypse! I get to play R/W again! Yee haw!