Big Beats From Badsville
Now before I rip off The Cramps anymore, here is the basis for my discussion:
1) Mercadian Masques is a slow, limited environment
2) Urza's Block is a fast control environment
3) Nemesis is a very fast expansion, with few constructed worthy cards for the current metagame
Bringing us to the conclusions:
1+2) Standard right now is a fast control environment, only helped in maintaining this type of play with cards like Port, Bowl, Misdirection, Bouncer, Thwart, Snuff Out, Wumpulupagus (yes, I WILL be calling Thrashing Wumpus that from now on), etc. The notable exception to this is Green with Vine Dryad, Hunted Wumpus, and Invigorate. Every color has access to Port and Bowl, while they received little incentive to splash a second color, much less play a two color deck.
1+2+3) Standard will soon be a fast control environment with less margin for slip up in the control department, leaving true beatdown (Stompy, only aided by Nemesis) and combo (most likely Sabre Bargain) as more likely choices due to their consistency.
And bringing us three old favorites; Gobboburn, White Weenie, and Stampy (although Green Beats haven't really "left")
Gobble'uns
4 Goblin Lackey
4 Goblin Cadets
4 Goblin Patrol
4 Goblin Raiders
4 Goblin Masons
4 Goblin War Buggy
4 Reckless Abandon
4 Shock
4 Seal of Fire
4 Flame Rift
4 Rashidan Port
16 Mountain
Sideboard
4 Keldon Vandals
3 Thran Lens
4 Distorting Lens
4 Ankh of Mishra
The way I calculate if a beatdown deck is good or not is to add up all the damage sources as if they hit once. This deck does 96 damage, as opposed to a Goblin burn deck I was very successful with in Extended that had 108. This“Damage Index” is relevant in the fact that if you divide it by 5 (the approximate number of cards you realistically get to use to kill your opponent with before your speed is overwhelmed by there control), you should get 18+. Any less and you really start to risk stalling out. Granted this is a limited model, but it is a good gauge of a deck in an environment that has not fully developed. Finally, this is based on realistic card choices (Otherwise, Inferno would go into this deck). This is a very strong number, leading to a lot of fourth turn kills, usually due to double Flame Rift. Let's just look at a non-Lackey start:
Mountain, 1cc goblin, go
Land, burn defender or drop 1/2cc goblin, attack
Land/burn defender, attack, goblin
Land/burn player, attack, or attack, Flame Rift, Flame Rift
You just have to get lucky against Stompy, as every other deck is going to get really hurt by Flame Rift and Reckless Abandon. Lackey is still pretty darn good, like a free Rebel engine, as you should rarely cast any creatures past turn 2. Sideboard is up to you, of course, but Black removal and Thermal Gliders/Cho-Manno's Blessing really mess up your math, as do Masticores and Grim Monoliths/Voltaic Keys.
Stompy has always held a place of disdain in my heart, as it really just doesn't have a way to do those last 1-4 points of damage, but now Rancor makes it all better. Trampling creatures with Lightning Bolts in their hands are hard to defeat. I still don't like it but here's what you'll probably be seeing soon:
4 Wild Dogs
4 Skyshroud Ridgeback
4 Llanowar Elves
4 Pouncing Jaguar
4 River Boa
2 Albino Troll
2 Uktabi Orangutan
4 Vine Dryad
4 Rancor
4 Giant Growth
4 Seal of Strength
2 Invigorate
4 Land Grant
14 Forest
SB
4 Elvish Lyrist
2 Uktabi Orangutan
4 Rushwood Dryad
2 Invigorate
1 Lumbering Satyr
Lightning Bolt has been reprinted and its name is Giant Growth. A Ridgeback, Boa, or Dryad will deliver these special "three to the head" packages through rain, sleet, or snow. Although the damage index is only 80, this deck can still pull off those turn four wins, although this is more of a turn five kind of deck. What it lacks in speed and raw damage potential, it makes up for with consistency and tenacity. Powder Keg? Don't make me laugh. Your opponent is already at 8-14 life, and the Keg doesn't get Dryad (your best choice to Rancor, usually), Boa, or Troll. Drop your remaining creature or three, pound, and Bolt, Bolt, Bolt your way to your next match-up. Rushwood Dryads may become a tech sideboard call if Stompy keeps up its prevalence, or if Control Green/Green-Blue is common in your tournament area. Blastoderms are a possibility that the deck can try out as well, but I like winning a turn sooner rather than getting held up by a regenerator because I can't Rancor him up. I can't say enough good stuff about this deck: it's like you are playing with 8 Lightning Bolts.
The new Rebel WW is all about Lin Sivvi. Pumping out rebels efficiently, recycling them, rinse, repeat. Most voices I have heard on the Internet are calling for two, but if you play anyone with removal or the mirror match-up, you will want three. Why? Because Lin Sivvi is only overshadowed by Morphling. LIN SIVVI IS BETTER THAN MASTICORE for what it does. It doesn't matter that you may draw one when you have on in play. You need the backup, and it can be pitched to the Mantra if need be.
4 Ramosian Sergeant
4 Ramosian Lieutenant
4 Steadfast Guard
4 Fresh Volunteers
1 Thermal Glider
2 Nightwing Glider
1 Defiant Vanguard
3 Lin Sivvi
4 Crusade
4 Disenchant
4 Reverent Mantra
4 Armageddon
2 Gaea's Cradle
19 Plains
Sideboard
2 Glorious Anthem
2 Worship
4 Erase
3 Ankh of Mishra
2 Story Circle
2 Enlightened Tutor
Read Omeed's article from last week if you haven't already. He explains it very well. Here are the Cliff's Notes.
1) Search for Rebel's during your opponents discard step
2) Mantra is very effective, even if it only saves 1 creature
3) Geddoning is a good thing...
4) ...Because you can lay a Cradle and go to town
In this incarnation, you should be searching enough to make whatever you need float to the top. The Tutors are therefore in the sideboard to make sure that what ever you want floats to the top. Arrest may be a good choice against Stompy or Black, but probably isn't necessary. The Rebel engine is amazing, and busting the Defiant Vanguard cap is a pretty sweet surprise.
In short, beatdown is back, and it will be pretty hard to beat, even with a turn three Morphling. So dust off those extra Wrath of Gods and Ring of Gixes, you may actually need them.
Good luck and have fun,
Erik Berg
galtwish@hotmail.com
















