It's been nearly a month since my effective lifetime banishment from Magic - and like any good habit, it takes time to break. With my ability to play Sanctioned events stifled and no 5-Color deck, I've been forced to channel my competitive spirit in another direction. After collecting some Finkels, Hystrodons, and Birds of Paradise from StarCity, I decided to throw a random pile of cards together and call it my"fun deck," encourage some other people to build such decks, and get some savage multiplayer action going. My deck was effectively a small 5-Color, mainly focused on green and blue.

My preparation for this format was minimal. I finally decided on Type 1 B&R lists with play conditions as attacking only left and right - and no auto-win conditions like Coalition Victory or Test of Endurance. I had intended on reading up on the some of the foremost multi-player authors' best works. Considering that idea reminded me that Anthony Alongi forces my stoned brain to comprehend long animal names like"snake,""whale," and"buzzard that circles near the top of my head." He then expects me to keep in mind what they mean, so I don't have to scan up to the top of the article every two cards - and that's a lot of work, let's be honest. So instead, I ran on my own with a bunch of good cards and then some really fun stuff, too.

Interested in a list?! Of course not! Well, screw you - I'm writing, sucka.

Artifact:
1 Sol Ring
4 Fellwar Stone
1 Phyrexian Grimmoire
2 Mindless Automaton
1 Jayemdae Tome
1 Legacy Weapon
1 Draco

Fellwar Stone has to be broken, right? See, 5-Color did teach me something. Phyrexian Grimmoire was an instant addition to my 5-Color when it was released in Tempest, and there's no telling how many times you get back the same Krosan Tusker when you ask the guy across the table really nicely.

Black:
4 Expunge
1 Khabal Ghoul - Beatings/n?

Blue:
4 Merfolk Looter
4 Ophidian
4 Thieving Magpie
4 Waterspout Djinn
4 Impulse
1 Rhystic Study
2 Circular Logic
1 Fact or Fiction
2 Desertion
1 Allied Strategies
4 Future Sight

I figured that Ophidian, Magpie, Finkel, and Hystrodon would be nuts, hitting up the players one either side. Future Sight is insane and makes you a target right away - but Desertion a Nekrataal once, and people get scared.

Green:
2 Exploration
4 Birds of Paradise
4 Utopia Tree
4 Wall of Roots
4 Vine Trellis
4 Wall of Mulch
4 Wild Mongrel
4 Albino Troll
2 Naturalize
4 Yavimaya Elder
1 Uktabi Orangutan
4 Krosan Tusker
4 Harrow
4 Blastoderm
1 Chain of Acid
4 Hystrodon

I need two more Explorations - send them to me! Walls stop the early beats and just the send the,"I'm not your punching bag" signal. Tusker, Harrow, Birds, and Tree make turn 4 Cromat a reality...

Turn 4 Cromat...tasty.

Red:
1 Firebolt
1 Chain of Plasma
1 Flametongue Kavu
1 Goblin Sharpshooter

White:
1 Swords to Plowshares
1 Enlightened Tutor
1 Disenchant
1 Seal of Cleansing
1 Dismantling Blow
3 Congregate

Multicolored:
1 Terminate
1 Eladamri's Call
1 Psychatog
4 Shadowmage Infiltrator
4 Cromat
2 Prophetic Bolt
1 Ordered Migration

Land:
4 Treetop Village
4 Faerie Conclave
Tons of basics

A little spot removal, a little lifegain, a few counters, some mana help, and some fat guys - what more does a multiplayer deck need? Stop writing articles already, people, I'm a damn genius!

Ordered Migration? Hey, I'm the Einstein here, not you. Smartass.

My opposition from my left to right:

• Peter Scheffner
• Jason Zier
• "In your face with a can of" Chase
• Dave"Big C" Conway
• Luke Dowski
• Luke Pliska

Seven of us sat down and ponied up five bucks apiece to be divided between the last two standing.

My immediate threats were Luke and Peter - and while I didn't know what Luke was playing, I had played Scheffner the day before. He was trying to run an Enchantress/Recycle deck that would build up some defense and then explode and take out several people in one turn. My original plan was to leave him alone if I sat next to him, as I planned on being too slow.

However, unfortunately for Peter, this failed to happen.

The game was started with,"Shotgun going first," by Jason, who"shotguns" everything in sight. Schneffer nixed that, wanting to go first because he deck was slow. Chase then asked me,"Who goes first?" I replied with,"the person with the largest shoe size, obviously." I started real quick with Forest, Bird and had a ton of gas in my hand. Mongrel and Ophidian, along with a Cromat and two more lands, meant that I was going to destroy Peter as fast as I could. Jason helped me out by getting a fast start too. He was black/red/blue and played a Festering Goblin and a Shivan Zombie in his first two turns. (See, in this world, we all have savagely tight land draws, even when playing 100+ cards) Jason and I spent our time beating on Peter - and with my fourth-turn Cromat, he was out and playing pinball in no time flat.

On the other side of the table, Conway was going nuts as well. His first turn consisted of Mox Pearl, Tundra, and two Suntail Hawks. Following that, he dropped Glorious Anthem and bashed for four to Luke Dowski. When the Anthem got cast, Chase fingered his Mogg Fanatic and looked at the Hawks for a few seconds...

"Hmm... Nah, those guys are safe." Conway decided to pay back Chase by not attacking him for some time.

Conway's Bird deck looked scary early, so I was thankful he was a couple seats away. Chase was playing the black/red deck I traded him for a bunch of cards for my deck. Balthor, the Defiled with black and red creatures that sacrificed or had"comes into play" effects: Mogg Fanatic, Shock Troops, Keldon Champion, Shambling Swarm, and Ghitu Slinger comprised some of the creatures. Chase also had the Phyrexian Tower/Volrath's Stronghold/Rukh Egg sickness in the deck as well. Chase and Jason should have destroyed people together - but instead, they sat next to each other, and after Peter was killed, Jason turned his attention to Chase and not me. They both took significant losses trying to kill each other, and in the meantime Big C took out Luke Dowski's mono-green Elf deck and I was going to work on Luke Pliska. This game was going much faster than anticipated.

Conway swooped in and killed Chase with ten Ordered Migration Bird tokens, and then finished off Jason the following turn, but I got my Legacy Weapon with Enlightened Tutor, and thought I'd be able to stabilize against Conway after my fat Congregate. This however was not to be. After I swung the Cromat in on Pliska for the final points, the Legacy Weapon looked to make short work of Conway's Bird army.

Big C had other ideas, mind you. Soulcatcher's Aerie came down - and then he dropped the bomb: Airborne Aid.

"I'll draw nine?"

"Hmm... Guess so, C." After I stuffed twenty damage down my fat face, bringing me to a reasonable life total, I swung back with Ophidian, Finkel, and Cromat and drew into some Walls that mocked me. Birdman Conway swung some Birds back at me and then took all of his lands and shipped them to his 'yard."You packing?""No, I just thought I'd lead by example." Armafreakingeddon?! I just packed up my cards, and we split up $35 between us.

My first multiplayer experience in years was a great one. I expected the game to take much longer - but all the decks save for Peter's were very aggressive, and no one held back.