I promised on the StarCityForums that I'd build this deck, I promised I'd play it, and I promised that I'd report about it. So you see, it was destined that you'd be reading a report about one of the strangest combos to come out of Scourge.

Let me show you the deck, so you can have that perfect moment of"What the hell?" before I explain what it's supposed to do.

Spells:
4 Shock
4 Aether Burst
3 Flash of Insight
2 Peek
2 Boomerang
2 Metamorphose
2 Pyroclasm
2 Slice and Dice
2 Long-Term Plans
2 Radiate
1 Skullscorch

Creatures:
3 Thoughtbound Primoc
2 Mischievous Quanar
2 Thieving Magpie
2 Tephraderm
1 Chromeshell Crab

Lands:
12 Island
12 Mountain

Sideboard:
4 Avarax
4 Artificial Evolution
4 Lightning Rift
2 Chromeshell Crab
1 Slice and Dice

Did you see the devastating combo - the two-card combination that says"I win?" No? Hint: It's probably the two cards you looked at and said,"Remus, why are you playing with those misbegotten pieces of cardboard?"

Yes, I have built a deck out of the combo between Metamorphose and Radiate. Metamorphose is one of the most situational cards in Scourge; Radiate is one of the most overlooked (and underused) Johnny cards from Torment. But together, they are a seven-mana combo that allows you to pick up every permanent your opponent has in play and put them on top of his deck in whatever order you choose. There are few combos in Magic that are as devastating... The problem is building a deck to support it.

First you need to set up the combo - and there's tons of card searching and drawing for that. Long-Term Plans is surprisingly good, and works well with Flash of Insight. Peek serves double duty as easy card drawing and a way to check your opponent for threats in hand before setting off the combo. With so much card searching, I decided to put only two of each of Radiate and Metamorphose in the deck, as they're of very limited usefulness by themselves. Setting off the combo on turn 7 is generally not a problem, but often you'll want to wait, as the more your opponent commits to the board the worse a situation he'll be in later.

The next problem is eliminating Metamorphose's drawback - your opponent will drop every permanent in his hand into play. In my first design of this deck I sought to clean the opponent's hand using Skullscorch and Disrupting Scepter so that they would have nothing to drop... But that was too slow and too unreliable, as most players will just take the damage from the Skullscorch. A better strategy is to use bounce to return anything they drop back to their hand after your combo hits. Since Metamorphose is an instant, the combo can hit on their end turn (or, my favorite, during their attack), and so any creatures they drop will never get into combat before you bounce them. And then you will have several turns where your opponent will have nothing in play and nothing to cast.

You must kill them during that time, though... So the deck needs to keep a threat on the board at all times. I chose hardy creatures that were cost effective and fairly difficult to kill. I also found that Thieving Magpie was a big help, as it either helped you draw the combo or helped you draw more threats when the board was clear. The Mischievous Quanar is the only creature I'm not happy with - it's a cost-effective beater and can play some neat tricks with your instants and sorceries (and especially Skullscorch, which is why I kept one in the deck), but I'm thinking I might want to replace the Quanar with some creatures that are more difficult to kill. When choosing creatures I noticed two happy accidents that I decided to roll with - all my creatures are of three toughness or more, and all except the Magpie are beasts. This allowed me to maindeck Pyroclasm, and sideboard Artificial Evolution to turn the tables on tribal decks. In testing, I giggled every time I saw a Noxious Ghoul hit play, as evolving it to Beasts is very like kicking a goth in the nuts.

Not that I'd do that. Some of my best friends are goths. But they're"perkygoths," meaning they're happy and friendly and sexually promiscuous, and I firmly believe in all of those things. But angsty teenagers whining about their dark lords don't impress me -- I've slept in beds covered with Cthulhu plushies and sung along with"Shoggoth on the Roof," so I'm already on the hit list of any dark lords out there.

Chromeshell Crab deserves special mention: This is an anti-Exalted Angel card. The Angel is the most-played card in the game right now, and often she is backed with countermagic. The Crab is great for dealing with her, as most players will not counter a morph creature unless they're awash in mana and cards in hand. I kept one Crab in the maindeck in case I hit an Angel deck (which I did), but two more definitely go in the sideboard. Avarax is another sideboard card that's great against control. The rest of the sideboard is Lightning Rifts for dealing with Slide decks, Artificial Evolution as mentioned, and a Slice and Dice for more weenie hate.

I've been expecting a raft of goblin and elf decks to show at my local FNM. Haven't seen them yet. The top local players are going to control decks, in an effort to cut the weenies off before they get dangerous... And everyone else is still in the rogue stage. There was a lot of depth in Scourge, and it's going to take a while for everyone to work through it and get all the weird decks out of their system.

Which, to be honest, is what this deck is all about.

So how did it play?

Match 1: Counter Angel
I guess this was a rogue deck, although there wasn't much surprising in it. It was simply a deck packed full of various counters, Wrath of God, and Exalted Angel for the kill. A lot of cycling cards too. It could have been AstroGlide without Astral Slide, or Wake without Mirari's Wake. Either way it was bad news for me - combo decks do not do well against control.

I got depressed in the first game when I realized how many counters this guy is running. This deck does not have enough early threats, and he countered all the creatures I tried to play, then started countering my card drawing and searching. I managed to kill an Angel with burn, but he put another one out, and the game didn't last much longer.

Sideboard: +2 Chromeshell Crab, +4 Lightning Rift, -2 Tephraderm, -4 Shock.

Second game: I mulliganed to get a Lightning Rift in my hand, and played it second turn. It did a lot of damage, taking him to six life and helping me kill an Angel before he Cunning Wished for a Ray of Revelation to remove the Rift. I stole a second Angel with a Chromeshell Crab, but he Wrathed and then played a third Angel. I had the combo in my hand but knew he had a hand full of counters, and he takes me down.

Oh, well. Record: 0-1.

Second match: Psychatog Rogue
Interesting twist on Psychatog, but I don't think it was very good. This guy had Cabal Ritual and Temporal Fissure in his deck, which he apparently made room for by bumping the counters - which was good news for me. He also had Phage, The Untouchable, which was a surprise, but not a big threat. I think this deck may have been thrown together... It wasn't very impressive.

I played a first-turn Peek and saw Cabal Ritual, Dirge of Dread, and Temporal Fissure, and began to wonder what I was facing. None of those were threats, though, and my third-turn Thoughtbound Primoc went to town on his head. He Fissured it and some of my land, and played a Psychatog next turn - but by then I had a Thieving Magpie on the board and he had no way to block it. I drew bounce every turn to keep Psychatog inactive, then played a Tephraderm and pounded him to death.

Sideboard: -2 Pyroclasm, +2 Lightning Rift. I had little idea about what I was facing, but I saw some cyclers.

Second game he put out an early Psychatog for no apparent reason. I got both Thieving Magpies on the board, which he could neither block nor Smother, and I started drawing massive amounts of cards. Since the only trick I had seen was the Fissure, I decided to commit more to the board, and dropped a morphed Crab and Quanar. I burned Psychatog to death and he played another, then he stole my morphed Quanar with Blatant Thievery.

Ooookay. I put out a Tephraderm to rule the board, and then he played Phage. By then I was getting sick of how much this looked like a limited game. I stole Psychatog with the crab on his turn, bounced both the Crab and the Quanar back to my hand, then I attacked with everything. Phage was his only blocker, and she was looking like an anorexic teen at a gangbang...

Record: 1-1. Better, but I hadn't seen the combo yet.

Tertiary Match: Wake
This was a standard Wake deck piloted by a friend of mine. He's very good, one of the best in the store, but I had an edge in that I know his deck inside and out.

First game, he put out Compulsion and an early Angel. I had two Metamorphosis in my hand and Long-Term Plans. I searched for the combo, then Metamorphosed the angel - he dropped a Mirari's Wake. When the Radiate I searched for showed up I pulled the combo off, piling everything on his board into his library. Only one problem: I had no threats on the board. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I felt I had to stop him, but I probably should have waited.

We both draw land for a while - him re-drawing his own land, and me suffering through a glut. I got some creatures on the board, but he was holding a Wrath from earlier. He managed to draw through all his land, then started playing his cards again and I couldn't stop him. I did kill that Angel when it reappeared, and it took him forever to set up, but eventually I saw a Wake and a Compulsion on his side of the table and I decided to concede.

I probably should have played it out and forced a draw, but I knew my sideboard would help. Besides, he began complaining that he'll lose three DCI points if I beat him. It's tough to be a friend sometimes.

Sideboard: +4 Avarax, +2 Chromeshell Crab, -2 Pyroclasm, -2 Slice and Dice, -2 Shocks. I need to keep pressure on him, and have a threat out if the combo hits again.

Second game: I Boomerang a land to slow him down, then put a Thieving Magpie out to dig for the combo. He used Moment's Peace twice to keep me from drawing cards. Avarax came out, daring him to Wrath, and he didn't have much choice. I played the second Avarax after the wrath. By then I had found the combo, and I waited for him to tap out for another Moment's Peace then I reset his side of the board. Avarax had all the time in the world to pound him into jelly.

Nice. That's the way it's supposed to work.

Third game... Well, it was my turn for mana screw. Happens to everyone eventually. I did manage to Shock an early morphed Angel, but he set up with a Compulsion, a Wake, and another Angel before I could play a creature - a morphed Crab. I stole the Angel and he wrathed. I tried to play more creatures and he countered them. He started Wishing for Elephant Ambush, but tapped out to make the tokens, and I used my bounce to vaporize them.

But it was only a reprieve. He put a third Angel in play and protected it well, never tapping out completely again - at least I taught him that lesson.

Record is now 1-2. Where were the beatdown decks? I was promised a field full of beatdown decks!

Match the Fourth: Goblins
Ah, finally, beatdown. This was a sub-par goblin deck, as he admitted that he didn't run Goblin Warchief. One way or another, though, I feared no goblins.

He put out Sparksmith then Embermage Goblin, which was apparently his substitute for the Warchief. I waited for him to put the second Embermage in play before I Slice and Diced. I put out a Thieving Magpie and started drawing cards, then gave him a Tephraderm to deal with. He got a Goblin Piledriver, which I Shock, and some other goblins in play, and then I found the combo to clear his board, and Tephraderm lunches on a tasty goblin player.

Sideboard: -2 Boomerang, -1 Aether Burst, +2 Artificial Evolution, +1 Slice and Dice. Why bother bouncing goblins?

He played Raging Goblin the first turn, with Sparksmith the next. I Slice and Diced them away. He played Embermage Goblin and another Raging Goblin, and I realized I had no other burn. I Artificial Evolutioned a Goblin Burrows to slow the bleeding - then I got Thieving Magpie out, and he had to play three Embermages to deal with it. By the time he did I drew two Shocks, and I took care of two-thirds of the Embermage threat. Then I played Skullscorch with him holding only two cards, thinking I'd knock him down in life and make things faster...But he instead, he discards his hand.

Okay, buddy... I set up the combo and set it off, with a Quanar in play as my beatdown machine.

Record: 2-2. Better. I really wish everyone was playing goblins.

Five is the number of the Match: Birds
Yes, birds. You may be getting the impression now that there's a lot of rogue decks at my local FNM. That impression would be correct. In a low-population area, we get a lot of kids and casual players, mixed with just a few serious players. But nobody, to my knowledge, has successfully made a tourney-quality bird deck. I've tried, and I'm widely regarded as the Mad Deckbulder.

First game: He put out Suntail Hawk, then used Battle Screech to amass an army. I Slice and Diced them away, and began a Primoc beatdown. He played Soulcatcher's Aerie, which was fine with me; I pulled the combo and erased his board, beating him down with the Primoc and a Tephraderm that came along for the party.

Sideboard: -2 Aether Burst, +2 Artificial Evolution. I really didn't need to sideboard, but better to be safe than sorry.

Second game I got a first-turn Peek, and see two Aven Envoys, a Soulcatcher's Aerie, and two Soulcatchers in his hand. I'm holding a Chromeshell Crab. Interesting. That should tell you all you need to know about the game - he played Aerie, Soulcatcher, and some small birds, which I killed. He played the second Soulcatcher and I bounced it, then stole the 7/7 Soulcatcher and beat him to death with it and my own nearly as large Thieving Magpie.

I play him a few more times for fun, using other decks, while we wait for the finals to be announced.

Nice guy. Terrible bird deck.

Record: 3-2 matches, 7-4 games. And not quite good enough to make finals. One person did make finals with a 3-2 record, but he must have had a better game record. Oh, well.

It's a terrific combo, but I think the supporting structure needs work. I feel confident that it can handle any aggro deck out there, but control is a problem. That's the nature of much of Magic; the rock-paper-scissors template is a difficult game design to break. It's heartening that control is getting eviscerated once 8th rotates in... But that'll be a short window to play this deck, as when Mirrodin comes we lose Radiate and a great combo is resigned to casual play. Ah, what could have been. Maybe something similar to Radiate will be in Mirrodin...and the Combo Deck That Man Was Not Meant To Play will be dead, but dreaming.