Fish is slowly dying. It's a sad, but noble truth that must be accepted. Its limelight is fading, and I for one am seriously pissed. What about you, players of Fish? The metagame has moved on, leaving you behind! Those Workshop-tapping, Welder-activating, Storm-boosting, Akroma-dropping bastards are laughing at all of you behind your backs! Will you stand for this? Of course not! So how about some new tech for those not-so-thriving decks? Well, don't kill the messenger here, but it's from Unhinged. But still, those guys won't know what hit 'em!

Let's switch gears for a moment. Unhinged has been out for a little while now... and I'm surprised that widespread use of Name Dropping hasn't exploded. I immediately fell in love with this card, realizing great power and potential in it. Combos came to mind, because the ability to play a spell over and over again tends to do that to you. But one problem emerged. What if they decide not to say anything that's included on the lovely combo pieces in my graveyard? It's pretty easy not to say, "That's a lovely Beta Time Walk you have...oh, damn!" Or, "Orim's Chant does what again...oh, hell!" Short of physically making my opponent speak the desired words (i.e. beating him into submissive pulp), I needed to find a way of enabling Name Dropping for maximum efficiency.

My wandering and loose eyes then saw Loose Lips, and Garfield saw that it was good. I deduced that it would be in my best interests to use this card, choosing a sentence carefully chosen so that it would activate Name Dropping. So, Name Dropping and Loose Lips on a creature results in either recurring spells or massive card draw...sounds good to me! I decided that this new deck must go to a most deserving and increasingly neglected archetype. Fish, your day has come (again). Sadly, only the extremely popular and meta-defining U/G/W variety experiences this boon, but a fish is a fish, amirite?

Fish Droppings
-The Beatz and Stuffs-
4 Meddling Mage
4 Mishra's Factory
4 River Boa
4 Spiketail Hatchling

-The Search/Draw-
1 Ancestral Recall
4 Brainstorm
3 Intuition
4 Loose Lips

-The Droppings-
4 Name Dropping

-Protection and Utility-
4 Force of Will
2 Isochron Scepter
2 Orim's Chant
2 Swords to Plowshares
1 Time Walk

-The Mana-
2 Flooded Strand
1 Forest
2 Island
1 Plains
3 Polluted Delta
4 Tropical Island
4 Tundra

Just look at that... Fish at its finest. This fine pile of metagame-distorting goodness is ready to take on the new scene, and with renewed vigor.

Intuition is the all-star here. It can fetch the combo components, only to be brought back to fetch nifty spells for the hand and grave for further recurring. The mini toolbox within the deck is quite nifty as well. Infinite Time Walks grant infinite turns, infinite Orim's Chants locks them down quite nicely, Darksteel Colossus has nothing on StP, and who doesn't like recurring Recalls?

Nearly everything else is for stalling for time to get the necessary pieces out, or to kill the opponent with extreme prejudice. I've found that, for the chosen sentence, this one works particularly well... "Praise Orim's ancestral intuition and will to walk!" There are few spells that sentence won't fetch in this deck. Plus, Orim's will to walk is quite impressive!

But what if they don't succumb to your devious strategy? Well, then you get to draw many, many cards and kill them via war of attrition! Either method works. And if you do happen to have a most unfun opponent, Isochron also recurs spells, so you can still have your tart and eat it too!

But enough with all this chivalrous and noble "let's save Fish" mantra, let's go a-bandwagon-jumpin'! With Oath of Druids taking center stage, I felt that this concept could easily fit the Oath-mold, as dumping mass quantities of stuff into the graveyard for a deck that feeds off the graveyard is a generally good idea. Unlike the more controlling route that was taken with Fish's revival, this take on the concept is pure combo. If you thought Dish got all gussied up, then wait 'till you see the new(er) Vintage Oath!

Druid Droppings (what is with me and feces, anyway?)
-The Win-
2 Tendrils of Agony

-The Search/Draw-
4 Brainstorm
2 Deep Analysis
2 Intuition
3 Loose Lips

-The Green-
1 Eternal Witness
2 Krosan Reclamation
3 Name Dropping
4 Oath of Druids

-The Broken-
1 Ancestral Recall
1 Demonic Tutor
1 Hurkyl's Recall
1 Yawgmoth's Will
1 Mind's Desire
1 Mystical Tutor
1 Time Walk
1 Vampiric Tutor

-The Mana-
1 Black Lotus
1 Lion's Eye Diamond
1 Mox Emerald
1 Mox Jet
1 Mox Pearl
1 Mox Ruby
1 Mox Sapphire
2 City of Brass
2 Flooded Strand
4 Forbidden Orchard
3 Gemstone Mine
3 Polluted Delta
4 Tropical Island
4 Underground Sea

This expensive looking pile has two different routes to take.

Plan A: You can recur Mind's Desire every turn for some extremely sick and broken plays, but only if your opponent will say the chosen sentence.

Plan B: Oath nearly everything in the grave, Eternal Witness for Will, and then you go broken for Tendrils to kill. This is used when your opponent is a buffoon who doesn't want to have fun. Because everyone should want to be on the receiving end of recurring Mind's Desires!

Plan for Plan A: Get Name Dropping + Oath in play and Loose Lips in hand, which is very easy with all the draw and tutoring in the deck. Oath for Eternal Witness, getting back Yawgmoth's Will, play the Will, replay any fast mana, and play Loose Lips on the Witness, ("Worship my desire to walk at will and recall!" works nicely) then start recurring Mind's Desires for sick brokenness that's fun for the whole family!

Plan for Plan B: Oath for Eternal Witness, get back Will, play Will, go broken, Tendrils for win.

And so. After giving an ailing deck the boost it needed, and after helping an existing powerhouse escalate to power... mansion? No, no, that's no good. Let me think up something witty for this one... um... damn. Until then, just because you play Vintage doesn't mean you can't play with your own Droppings with the casual folks once in a while!

Anthony Harrison
Moxlord22@gmail.com