It doesn't matter whether you destroy a Birds of Paradise in response to your opponent tapping it for mana, or whether you destroy a Prodigal Sorcerer in response to him tapping for one damage - the effect is already on the stack, and it's too late to do anything about it. Think of me, throwing a hand grenade at you; sure, you can shoot me, but that grenade is still coming towards you.

(You can do something to neutralize the ability on the stack - for example, you can cast a Healing Salve to prevent the damage - but you can't stop the spell or ability from going there in the first place.)

(Opposition decks do a tricky thing - they tap someone's lands during their draw phase. Since sorcery and creature spells can only be cast played during one of the two main phases, and you can't carry mana over from one phase to the next, this effectively prevents their opponent from casting playing sorcery spells or creatures. However, there's nothing to stop a clever player from playing an instant like Naturalize in response.)

What you want to do is tap it in the Beginning of Combat Step, before your opponent chooses what he's attacking with. (Combat has five steps: Beginning of Combat, Declare Attackers, Declare Blockers, Combat Damage, and End of Combat; read this article for a step-by-step explanation of Combat.) If you wait until he's declared it, tough luck for you.

Keep in mind that your opponent must give you a chance to respond during the Beginning of Combat. He can't say, "IattackwithaShivanDragonnotakebacks!" and pound on you. On the other hand, you can't wait to see what he's attacking with and then tap the biggest thing he sends your way; you have to choose which creature to tap before he chooses the creatures he'll be attacking with. (And yes, if you tap his big creature, he can choose not to attack with anything.)

(There is a distinct difference between cards where discarding is a cost you pay in order to get a benefit - like Wild Mongrel - and cards like Megrim, which do things whenever cards are discarded. As a rule, if the card says something like, "Discard a card: Do x," that's a cost and you must pay it.)

(Note, however, that some cards say "cards" and not tokens, like Compost. Compost will not care if a token hits the graveyard; it's waiting for cards. The wording on the card is very important!)

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