"This mirror match is stupid," said Tomi. "Mirror matches are usually stupid, but this is just dumb."
It was dumber than usual because Tuomo Niemenen and Tomi Walamies are playing the exact same deck. That's because they're on the same team, they came from the exact same country, and I think they may have actually shared the exact same apartment at one point.
It just goes to show: No matter how far you drive to the match, you're going to get paired against your pal in Round 1.
"I'd like to send greetings to everyone who also made the top 4 at States," said Walamies.
"You can say that from me, too," said Tuomo.
"He didn't," smirked Tomi, pointing at his pal.
"He played about five hundred matches with this Tinker deck," said Walamies, clad in a shirt that looked like an M.C. Escher painting, as he explained the playtesting that went into developing their U/R Tinker deck, featuring such platinum hits (literally) as Platinum Angel and Bosh, Iron Golem. "Me, I played maybe fifty."
Since they knew exactly what each other were playing, Tomi pulled out a card from his sideboard and pulled the old"Odd number or even number?" trick. (I think anyway - he was speaking in some crazy foreign language. How dare people not speak American in New Orleans?) It was a Rack and Ruin. By whatever rules they had agreed upon in their secret Icelandic pact, Tomi won.
Game 1:
Tomi pulled up his first seven cards and decided to mulligan. His next six cards were mountain, City of Brass, Lightning Greaves, Tinker, a Pentavus, and a City of Traitors. He reluctantly kept.
Tuomo stared at his cards as if he might burn a hole through them with the power of his gaze, and then shrugged and mulliganed his own.
Tomi led with City of Brass and waved the turn on; Tuomo had a far more interesting start, leading off with a Goblin Welder.
Tomi laid a freshly-plucked Ancient Tomb, took his two damage, and laid the Greaves - and Tuomo brought out a second-turn Metalworker. That's never good, as entering your untap phase with a Metalworker in play is usually game...
Tomi thought and laid a City of Traitors, deciding he'd had enough mana for now, and laid his own Metalworker. Tuomo then proceeded to show everyone why allowing a Metalworker to live is a Really Bad Idea in any matchup.
He Thirst for Knowledged, discarding a Seat of the Synod, then tapped his Metalworker to reveal a hand with two Tangle Wires, two artifact lands, and a Chromatic Sphere, flooding his pool with ten mana. He laid Sphere, popped it, Thirst for Knowledged again, and considered for a very long time before discarding two lands with a scowl on his face.
But hey, he still had five mana floating, laid a Voltaic Key to burn off one of them, paid another to untap his Metalworker, revealed Platinum Angel and two other artifacts, then laid the Angel, and a Tangle Wire.
"Son of a...." Tomi muttered.
It was Tuomo's third turn, and he now had Voltaic Key, Metalworker, Tangle Wire, Goblin Welder, and Platinum Angel on the board. Welcome to the new Extended, folks.
Tomi tapped everything but his Traitors, then played a sole Grim Monolith and passed the turn glumly.
At the end of his turn, Tuomo Weldered his Tangle Wire away for a Chromatic Sphere, popped the Sphere, and flipped through his five cards. He tapped the Metalworker to reveal two more Tangle Wires in his hand, a Citanul Flute, and three more artifacts....
Between Welder and other tricks, Tuomo had access to twenty-four mana, so he could have played Citanul Flute, searched for Bosh, and began flinging large things at Tomi's head with enough mana to spare for a Tangle Wire.
Tomi scooped. Ouch.
Tomi sided in four Rack and Ruins, a Mindslaver, and a Triskelion, taking out, among other things, a Sphere, a Key, a Masticore, and a Thirst, opting to trim all of the excessives out his deck.
The two players discussed strategies in some foreign language during the match - old friends who inadvertently left a reporter feeling lost in translation.
Niemenen - 1, Walamies - 0
Game 2:
Tomi started with a City of Brass, Greaves, Grim Monolith, Goblin Welder, Voltaic Key, Tinker, and City of Traitors. He thought about it for a bit and then kept.
Tuomo - proving that mulliganing aggressively is the best strategy in the Tinker-on-Tinker matchup - dropped to six. He probed his cheek with his tongue before he kept, not looking particularly thrilled with his cards.
Tomi led with City of Brass, casting a Goblin Welder. Tuomo matched it, and now two Welders stared at each other.
Tomi stared at his cards calmly, slowly considering the many options this hand gave him; it had no Metalworker to accelerate into the truly insane speed that Tuomo had demonstrated in the last game, but he could drop a City of Traitors and cast a Grim Monolith and then tap it for a Voltaic Key, untap the Monolith, and tap City of Brass for a Lightning Greaves (which he attached to the Welder) in preparation for dropping the Mindslaver he had just drawn.
Which is what he did.
(Mark Rosewater noted with glee that in the first four feature matches of Pro Tour: New Orleans, seven people were playing Mindslaver. If you can spare the mana for it, as so many Tinker builds can, why the heck not?)
Tuomo passed glumly. Land-hosed.
Tomi dropped Mindslaver, right on schedule, but kept his Welder protected under the Greaves. A nice fat Tinker and Pentavus in hand for backup. Tuomo had found his second land, a Traitors of his own that got him up to three mana, but it was looking grim. He Rack and Ruined Tomi's Mindslaver and Key away, but Tomi still had Goblin Welder - and naturally, he Welded the Monolith away to put the Mindslaver back in.
Tuomo, dutifully remembering that Goblin Welders work on other players, too, used his own Welder to flip the 'Slaver right back into a Voltaic Key.
Now with just a Goblin Welder under the auspices of a Lightning Greaves and Voltaic Key, Tomi Welded the Greaves back into a Monolith, tapped and untapped it for five mana, Tinkered the Monolith for another Mindslaver, and then took Tuomo's next turn.
An Object Lesson: How Can You F**k Up Someone's Turn?
Tomi considered what he had to work with in Niemenen's hand: Grim Monolith, Tinker, Thirst for Knowledge, Bosh, Lightning Greaves, City of Brass.
Given that all Tuomo had in play was a Goblin Welder, a land, and a City of Traitors, how would you screw with him?
Tomi's solution was to cast Monolith, then Tinker Tuomo's Grim Monolith away for a Triskelion. He shot Tuomo's Goblin Welder with Tuomo's Triskelion (but not before helpfully Weldering his own Key back into a Monolith), then pinged Triskelion and Tuomo in the face, sending the Triskelion to the grave. He then played the City to bury Tuomo's City of Traitors.
Well, that hurt.
Tomi returned to his own turn now, exhausted. Usually, on your opponent's turn, you get a little break while react to what he does and make future plans; making all of these bad decisions was hard work!
He tapped Monolith for Metalworker, then passed. Tuomo laid Lightning Greaves and got his Voltaic Key back.
Tomi showed Metalworker, revealing Triskelion and Bosh, then did it again, and Tuomo scooped.
Tomi 1 - Tuomo 1
"I got a really good hand with action; if I'd drawn the City of Traitors, I would have won right there on the spot. I think I was right to keep the hand, but it's risky," said Niemenen.
Game 3:
Tomi's opening grip was Voltaic Key, Ruin, a pair of Tinkers, Goblin Welder, Great Furnace, Seat of the Synod. He kept.
Tuomo started off with first-turn Traitors, Grim Monolith, Voltaic Key, untap Grim Monolith. Tomi only had a lowly first-turn Goblin Welder -
- what am I saying? First-turn Goblin Welder's a power play. Tomi busted out of the gates with a first-turn Goblin Welder.
Tuomo then played Metalworker, then Lightning Greaves, Greaved the Metalworker... And attacked. He had one card in hand, and it either wasn't an artifact or it wouldn't give him enough mana.
No matter. Tomi Rack and Ruined the Greaves and the Monolith away - and now that the Metalworker was targetable, leaving it vulnerable to his Welder, he then Weldered Tuomo's Metalworker, leaving a now-useless Greaves on Tuomo's creature-free board.
Tomi played his own Metalworker and passed. Tuomo, still in the game, played a Tangle Wire with four counters - which might have been a threat if Tomi didn't have an active Welder. Tomi Weldered the Tangle Wire away (leaving a useless Metalworker in its wake), then launched into his own turn, revealing three artifacts (Key, Monolith, and Seat of the Synod), played Key to untap it, Metalworkered again, Tinkered the Key away for Mindslaver, took Tuomo's next turn, laid the Synod, and Tinkered for Pentavus, which he could begin to create artifact tokens to Weld himself into insane loops....
Oh, to hell with it. Tuomo scooped.
Tomi - 2, Tuomo -1
The key cards in the matchup, according to both of them, are Mindslaver, Welder, and Metalworker. If you can untap with an active Metalworker, that's usually game.
"It's good that they banned some cards so the format is slower," Tomi noted dryly.
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